The Wild Woman Within: Self-Reflection Leads to Inner Power
“Within every woman, there lives a powerful force, filled with good instincts, passionate creativity, and ageless knowing. She is the Wild Woman, who represents the instinctual nature of women,” describes Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estés. Estés is an American poet, psychoanalyst, and post-trauma specialist with a doctorate in ethno-clinical psychology from the Union Institute & University.
In Dr. Pinkola’s 1992 book, “Women Who Run with the Wolves,” she established a new definition of female inner power, leading to clarity and self-reflection. Through her use of symbolism, she added a new layer to women's empowerment and expressed how it can take the form of something else entirely.
“Women are taught to not trust their instincts, so I’ve learned to push back against what I’ve been taught and to make sure I’m not only going with that,” says award-winning Art Deco mystery author, L.A. Chandlar.
She continues by explaining that this is what makes a wild woman. “To me, she’s someone who not only trusts her instincts but has the capability to push back,” Chandlar expresses.
Chandlar, among the other female mystery writers, continues to overcome misogynistic issues within the industry.
“My career is definitely male-dominated, and [the industry has] had a lot of social issues, in the misogynistic nature of things,” she claims. “Women writers have a lot more to overcome than men writers.”
After going public with a few other authors about misogynistic occurrences and harassment issues, Chandlar had to push and fight for what her natural instinct told her.
“I asked myself, what do I want? What do I stand for? I write about injustice every day—thrillers, mysteries, they’re about justice,” she explains. “So, am I just telling stories, or am I attracting those stories because it’s something I want in my life more?”
L.A. Chandlar has found her inner power and isn’t letting injustice affect it or overpower her natural instinct. “Overall, a wild woman is someone who is comfortable in their own skin, enough to not let those things impact their own decisions,” she states.
When it comes to self-reflection, an inner wild woman is someone who can help lead her to clarity regarding a situation or dilemma.
“Reflecting on a situation often brings clarity and helps me grow as a woman,” says University of Kansas Law student, Hailey Reed. “When I focus inward, I can really think about how my response to the dilemma will impact me and those around me.”
As a law student, Reed often deals with dilemmas where she uses self-reflection to find a resolution. “It helps you hold yourself accountable and prevents [you from] making any rash decisions or actions,” she says.
Similar to how L.A. Chandlar feels about others’ opinions of her decisions, Reed also has found that “reflecting helps [her] understand that not everything is personal and [she] can work to see the bigger picture.”
Through Reed stepping back and understanding how her actions may be perceived by others, her inner power is able to help her be the ‘best version of Hailey’—someone who does everything she wants and desires, unapologetically, without fear of what others will think of [her], what is ‘correct’ or ‘socially acceptable,’ and without fear that [her] actions will not work out,” she states.
In my own self-reflection, I’ve found that I feel powerful when I imagine my wild woman, as an outside source, pushing me to be the best version of myself as well. With Hailey Reed’s personal definition, it can be true of anyone. Women can envision the best versions of themselves as their source of motivation and confidence.
Elsa Garrison demonstrates her inner power by being the first woman staff photographer at Getty Images. “Certainly, in the sports industry, there are a lot more men than women. Women are outnumbered,” she claims.
Her motivation is sparked by her passion for capturing collegiate and professional sporting events, from the Olympics to the NCAA Final Four.
“There’d be times I would be at an event and it’s clear that some of the other folks didn’t want me there,” Garrison reflects from twenty years prior. “Just having that inner confidence and knowing that I’m here for a reason, and I’m going to carry on and do what I can do.”
While Elsa Garrison is aware of her inner power, Kendall Jeisy still has more to discover about herself. Jeisy is a sophomore at Pace University in New York City, majoring in both Art and Marketing, Advertising, and Integrated Communications. Starting college, she was nervous about living, studying, and eventually working in the Financial District.
Now, she recognizes her inner power and knows she has time to reflect. “I found out in my first year at college that I can take bigger leaps than I thought I could,” Jeisy expresses, “I’m capable of more than I give myself credit for.”
Kendall Jeisy’s story is common among other female students according to Takisha Parkins, the Assistant Director of Counseling Services at LIM College in New York. “I work with a lot of students, primarily female students, and a part of the work I do is helping them identify the inner power in themselves and help them look at past experiences to reframe them,” she explains.
Parkins advises others by saying, “If a person doesn’t acknowledge that there is power in who they are and all they’ve done for themselves and accomplished in their life, then it’s hard for them to maintain their confidence and recognize their inner power.”
Melanie Kressel, a Health Service Psychology Intern at Pace University, agrees with Parkins’ advice. Stating, “Self-reflection allows people to go internally and helps them think about themselves in a more focused manner.”
She continues, by explaining how looking inward helps women “connect to past experiences, relationships, and parts of their life that have influenced them as a person as well as their identity.”
“It allows women to move forward in a more confident and powerful way, where we’re not seen as less than, we’re instead seen as a powerful force that comes from being able to access deeper parts of ourselves,” Kressel shares.
To me, I envision my wild woman as a woman among the stars––always looking out for me and guiding me where I need to go. I’ve reflected on this idea many times, particularly at times when I faced dilemmas and didn’t know what my next chapter would look like.
A wild woman doesn’t necessarily mean a woman who defies the odds or overcomes great obstacles. While many women have empowering stories to share, a wild woman can be anyone who stays true to their natural identity and morals. Someone who looks within to find strength, confidence, and guidance. A wild woman could be a secondary source, like mine among the stars, or simply the best version you imagine of yourself.
I call upon my inner wild woman for confidence and leadership, and in turn, I feel less alone.
Creatively I expressed who my wild woman is, and when I first discovered her. Poetry allowed me to put words on paper and grant power to speech.
Envisioning her and describing the moment when I paused for a time of self-reflection, is an act that helped me fully understand my inner power and what each woman possesses deep down. I hope you feel less alone reading this, as I felt writing it.
I could see her, the wild woman. Dancing up in the heavens among the Milky Way and leaping from one constellation to the next. I felt her within me, calling me to find peace and savor this moment. This moment, in this little Midwest town, up where the light pollution gave way to the dazzling world of the night.
I looked up at the stars, unable to move or do anything but just stare. I had seen stars before; I had even been to this place before. But something about this night, something about this encounter with my inner wild woman, told me it was different.
I saw the wild woman whom I’d never noticed before. She beckoned to me, like a mother calling her child home after years of separation. As if I could reach out my hand and she would take me in her arms, stroking my hair and telling me everything was going to be alright. The feelings of home overwhelmed me with comfort and made me feel that I was finally in on a long-lost secret.
I knew I had always been chasing this feeling of belonging, that I was always on the hunt for it, searching every nook and corner. Hoping if I didn’t appear to look too hard for it, it would just stumble across my path. This wild woman among the stars showed me what true contentment felt like with the world.
I stared up at the great ocean of possibilities for what seemed like hours. Reflecting on what this feeling required me to do. This feeling propelled me and commanded me to continue into the unknown. It comforted me with all the heartache and loss I had experienced in my short 18-year life. But it gave me the courage to continue, to push past the pain and stand determined to claim what I wanted to be mine.
The wild woman continued to dance in the sky, slowly climbing from Queen Cassiopeia to the perfect oval crown, Corona Borealis. Until she faded, and there was nothing left but a twinkle among the stars and warmth in my chest. The woman became a part of me at that moment. The wild woman wasn’t simply an emotion of belonging, she was a state of mind.
The way a person holds their head up high when they enter a room or the smile that crosses their face when they were satisfied with an answer. I finally understood that I needed to embody the woman within to push ahead and start my next chapter.
With the twinkling of stars and the streak of the Milky Way above my head, I reflected on the state of mind I had just entered. What was this wild woman truly asking of me? Was she asking me to fake my confidence until I was finally ready to step out into the world as myself? Or was she telling me to take a step back and determine my self-confidence before I started this new phase of my life?
So many questions were left unanswered by this wild woman now within. But for me, the woman asked me to take a step back and embody the confidence and sense of purpose that I would need to move into my future. I had the sense of purpose down; I always knew there was something larger than myself that I was called to be a part of; a call to action if you will.
Shifting my gaze from one constellation to the next, I remembered the wild woman dancing among them what felt like moments ago. I remembered her calmness, her boldness to be up in the heavens, and her fire within that burned the brightest of all the stars.
But no, she didn’t burn, she didn’t waiver or fall, she radiated. She radiated the confidence to stand out, she represented the true wild woman of the night sky and chose me to embody her.
The power of what wild meant to me glowed, being certain of the next step I would take and not look back as I did. She wasn’t some far-off woman instructing me what to do and how to handle the interim between chapters, she instead wasn’t anyone.
I was the wild woman; I was the woman taking charge of my life and experiencing a life-changing moment under the beautiful night sky. I was teaching myself all along how to gain confidence, feel calm in the midst of what felt like chaos, and be at peace with the unknown and changing world around me.
I am the wild woman among the stars.