The Art of an NYC Birthday — The Lexington Line

Living in New York City means that nearly every weekend is someone’s birthday. Maybe this is a theory I’ve created on my own, but just about every weekend I’ve attempted to stay home, stay in, do homework, and be lazy, it’s yet another birthday. And I must go out.

I’ve quickly realized that there are two types of NYC birthday celebrations: the affordable and the extravagant.

Sometimes, you’re added to a giant group chat of numbers you don’t recognize, and sent a link to a restaurant where the cheapest appetizer is thirty dollars. The dress code involves a piece of clothing you don’t own and certainly cannot find at Goodwill in a time crunch.

On different occasions, word spreads that a close friend is hosting their own party in their own dorm or apartment. All you need to do is bring yourself and something to add to a messy potluck of cheap desserts.

I’ve become a fan of the second option: the affordable birthday celebration.

Not only due to money concerns, but also because of its comfort and home-like feeling. Don’t get me wrong—I love a good night out. However, as a birthday lover, I find that the close-quartered dorm parties always seems to be a little more meaningful.

One of my closest friends just celebrated her nineteenth birthday a couple of weeks ago.

We planned her party and celebrated in her four-person dorm at The New School. After a couple of months in the city, I realized that my friends and I had practically mastered the art of an affordable NYC birthday party, despite making a mistake or two on the way. The list of necessities is quite small, and the real dealbreaker for a good dorm party is the belief in what you can make of a 200 square-foot room.

These necessities include a table full of cheap snacks and drinks, homemade decorations, good music, and your favorite people. With these aspects you can create a night of beautiful conversation and connection, all without spending too much money or stressing over planning.

In such confined spaces, you have no choice but to converse with the person you’re squeezing past just to get to the bathroom. There's something inherently wonderful about watching the host, or birthday person, bathe in the love of the handfuls of people from completely different corners of their life that they've chosen to bring together. Especially in my first year of college, I’ve seen that nothing brings people together quite like a birthday party. Or maybe, it’s just that shared love of who we’re celebrating.

Another thing that I’ve realized about these dorm parties is that they rarely go according to plan, which is half of the beauty of them. Someone forgets candles for the cake or the lighter. The music is switching constantly, as people connect and disconnect to the speaker back and forth; the vibe of the music changes entirely with each switch.

If you’re attending a dorm party similar to the ones I attend, someone has brought a DJ board and is either making great mixes of songs you love or they barely know how to DJ at all. The handmade decorations are falling off the walls, and the roll of tape is long gone. The table, once painted beautifully with cheap treats, is now a mess of half-empty solo cups, vanilla cake crumbs, and misplaced dorm ID cards.

Somehow, in the middle of this chaos, the party works. People who have never met before start making plans for next week. They talk like they've known each other for months. The kitchen has become the most popular room—despite being the smallest—and you've long since forgotten about your assignment due tomorrow.

This is what makes birthday parties in New York so interesting. In a city so big, it can be surprisingly easy to stay within the bounds of your social bubble and have fun. Everyone is busy, and it feels like too much to make plans with new people, but birthdays interrupt that routine. They pull people together, away from their typical week plans. For a few hours, all the different parts of someone's life share the same tiny room.

So yes, there may always be another birthday party waiting on the weekend calendar. But I’ve found that this is something to be grateful for.

Do you prefer the affordable birthday party, or the extravagant? Leave a comment below.